Salamander Trust

Stepping Stones with Children Counselling Guide

Sue Holden Publications - English , , , , ,
Stepping Stones Counselling

Stepping Stones with Children Counselling Guide

This guide accompanies the Stepping Stones with Children manuals.  I wrote it with Jovin Riziki, focussing on the additional knowledge and skills that HIV counsellors need to work with both children who are affected by or living with HIV and their caregivers. We explore the differences between counselling adults and children, and outline the key steps to follow in different counselling situations involving children and caregivers. You can download the guide for free here (scroll down the page); you may need to register with the Salamander Trust’s website to access the document. Also available in KiSwahili.

Extract

We’ve written this guide for people who already have the knowledge, skills and experience needed to counsel adults about HIV and related issues. We haven’t included basic information, such as what counselling is or key skills for counselling. Instead we’ve focused on the additional knowledge and skills that counsellors need to work both with children who are affected by or living with HIV, and with their caregivers. We also outline the key steps to follow in different counselling situations involving children and caregivers. This guide accompanies the Stepping Stones with Children manuals. Children and caregivers who attend Stepping Stones with Children workshops learn to appreciate their abilities, and to find ways of using these to improve their lives. For example: caregivers learn how to discipline children rather than hitting or otherwise punishing them, while children learn how to set boundaries regarding sexual intimacy, and how to protect themselves and others from sexual abuse. Basics of counselling children HIV counselling with children, as with adults, aims to help them cope with emotions and challenges relating to HIV and its effects, and to make informed choices that will improve their quality of life. Though the focus may be on HIV, counsellors need to see and work with the whole child: all the things that affect their life. Counselling children includes:

  • helping them tell their story;
  • listening carefully;
  • giving them correct and appropriate information;
  • helping them make informed decisions;
  • helping them recognize and build on their strengths;
  • helping them develop a positive attitude to life.

Counselling children does not include:

  • making decisions for them;
  • judging or blaming them;
  • interrogating or arguing with them;
  • making promises you cannot keep;
  • preaching to or lecturing them;
  • imposing your own beliefs on them.

Our key tasks during counselling sessions with children and caregivers include:

  • helping them understand their situation and how they are feeling by reflecting back what they have told us, both verbally and non-verbally;
  • helping them explore their regrets and feelings of blame and anger;
  • supporting them in seeing what they may be able to do to improve their situation, even though many factors are beyond their control;
  • supporting them in making informed decisions;
  • sharing useful information with them;
  • supporting them in developing the courage and confidence to come up with their own strategies and hopes and plans for their future.

What’s different about counselling children? There are four key differences when counselling children as opposed to adults.

  1. We must adjust what we say and do to suit the age and development stage of each child. There should be a big difference between the way we work with a five-year-old who may not yet be able to write, and a 15-year-old who may already be emotionally mature.
  2. We usually work not with a single client, but with a child and their caregiver(s). We must attend to their different hopes and needs, and support them in working together.
  3. We have to be willing and able to talk with children about sex and sexuality, and we may find this difficult.
  4. We need to be mindful of local rules and laws regarding children, for example, knowing at what age and under what circumstances a child can get an HIV test without a caregiver’s consent.

Kivuko na Watoto Mwongozo wa Unasihi

Sue Holden Publications - Swahili , , , , ,
Stepping Stones Counselling Swahili

Kivuko na Watoto Mwongozo wa Unasihi

Mwongozo huu umeambatanishwa na mitaala ya Kivuko na Watoto. Tumeandika mwongozo huu kwa ajili ya watu ambao tayari wana taarifa, na stadi, na uzoefu unaohitajika katika kuwanasihi watu wazima kuhusu VVU na masuala yanayohusiana.  Yake tumeweka mkazo katika taarifa zile za nyongeza na stadi ambazo wanasihi wanazihitaji ili wafanye kazi na watoto wa makundi yote mawili, wale walioathiriwa na VVU au wanaoishi na VVU, na walezi wao. Pia tumeainisha zile hatua muhimu za kufuata katika mazingira ya unasihi yanayojumuisha watoto na walezi.

Unaweza kuipakua kwa bure hapa (fungua chini ukurasa); unaweza kuhitaji kujiandikisha na Salamander Trust tovuti ili kufikia hati.
Imeandikwa awali kwa Kiingereza.

Kutoka kwa kitabu

Tumeandika mwongozo huu kwa ajili ya watu ambao tayari wana taarifa, na stadi, na uzoefu unaohitajika katika kuwanasihi watu wazima kuhusu VVU na masuala yanayohusiana. Hatujaweka taarifa za msingi, kama vile unasihi ni kitu gani au stadi za unasihi. Badala yake tumeweka mkazo katika taarifa zile za nyongeza na stadi ambazo wanasihi wanazihitaji ili wafanye kazi na watoto wa makundi yote mawili, wale walioathiriwa na VVU au wanaoishi na VVU, na walezi wao. Pia tumeainisha zile hatua muhimu za kufuata katika mazingira ya unasihi yanayojumuisha watoto na walezi.

Mwongozo huu umeambatanishwa na mitaala ya Kivuko na Watoto. Watoto na walezi ambao wanahudhuria warsha za Kivuko na Watoto hujifunza kuthamini uwezo wao, na kutafuta njia za

kuzitumia katika kuboresha maisha yao. Kwa mfano: walezi kujifunza namna ya kuwafundisha watoto nidhamu badala ya kuwapiga au kuwaadhibu, wakati watoto wanajifunza namna ya kuweka mipaka kuhusiana na uhusiano wa kimapenzi (kingono), na namna ya kujikinga wao na wengine dhidi ya unyanyasaji wa kijinsia.

Misingi ya kuwanasihi watoto

Unasihi kwa ajili ya watoto, kama vile kwa watu wazima, kunadhamiria kuwasaidia kuhimili mihemko na changamoto zinazohusiana na VVU na athari zake, na kufanya uchaguzi ambao utaboresha maisha yao katika misingi ya kuwa na uelewa. Japokuwa mkazo unaweza kuwa ni katika VVU, wanasihi wanahitaji kuona na kufanya kazi na mtoto huyo kwa ukamilifu wake: mambo yote yanayogusa maisha yake.

Kuwanasihi watoto hujumuisha:

  • kuwasaidia wasimulie hadithi zao;
  • kuwasikiliza kwa makini;
  • kuwapatia taarifa sahihi na muafaka;
  • kuwasaidia wafanye uamuzi utokanao na uelewa;
  • kuwasaidia watambue na kujenga uimara wao;
  • kuwasaidia kujenga mtazamo chanya katika maisha.

Kuwanasihi watoto haijumuishi:

  • kufanya uamuzi kwa ajili yao;
  • kuwahukumu au kuwalaumu;
  • kuwahoji au kubishana nao;
  • kuweka ahadi ambazo huwezi kuzitimiza;
  • kuwahubiria au kuwafanyia mhadhara;
  • kulazimisha imani zako kwao.

Majukumu yetu makuu wakati wa vipindi vya unasihi na watoto na walezi hujumuisha:

  • Kuwasaidia waelewe hali zao na namna wanavyojisikia kwa kutafakari kile ambacho walitueleza hapo nyuma, kwa hali zote mbili; ya maneno na lugha ya mwili;
  • Kuwasaidia kutafakari majuto yao na hisia za kujilaumu na hasira;
  • Kuwasaidia ili waone wanachoweza kufanya ili kuboresha hali yao, hata kama mambo engine yako nje ya udhibiti wao;
  • Kuwasaidia kufanya uamuzi utokanao na uelewa;
  • Kushirikishana nao taarifa zenye manufaa;
  • Kuwasaidia katika kujenga ujasiri na kujiamini ili waweze kuibuka na mikakati yao wenyewe na matarajio na mipango kwa ajili ya hapo baadaye.

Ni kitu gani cha tofauti katika kuwanasihi watoto?

Yapo mambo manne ya tofauti wakati tunawanasihi watoto kinyume na watu wazima.

  1. Ni lazima turekebishe kile tunachokisema na kukifanya ili kishabihiane na umri na hatua za ukuaji wa kila mtoto. N lazima pawepo tofauti kubwa kati ya namna tunavyofanya kazi na watoto wa umri wa miaka mitano ambao wanaweza kuwa hawajajua kuandika bado, na wa umri wa miaka15 ambao wanaweza kuwa wamepevuka kimhemko.
  2. Kwa kawaida huwa hatufanyi kazi na mteja mmoja-mmoja, bali na mtoto pamoja na mlezi (walezi) wake. Ni lazima tushughulikie matarajio na mahitaji yao mbalimbali, na kuwasaidia wafanye kazi pamoja.
  3. Ni lazima tuwe tayari na uwezo wa kuongea na watoto kuhusu ngono na ujinsia, na tunaweza kuona ugumu katika mambo haya.
  4. Tunahitaji kuwa makini kuhusu taratibu za maeneo na sheria ziwahusuzo watoto, kwa mfano, kujua ni katika umri gani na mazingira gani mtoto anaweza kufanya kipimo cha VVU bila ridhaa ya mlezi.